Picture Perfect

It's official.
My readership are not as innocent as they seem. In fact, they're pretty much down-right rude and in some cases, distrubing.

According to the statistics, more people get to my blog by typing questionable search requests into search engines such as Google, than those who type innocent ones. Most of the phrases searched for included the word "breast," part of a recent post. No doubt google turned it up due to the fact it was used, as Helen put it "more than once."

What's disturbing is not just what was typed, but how it was typed. Often, it was a completely innocent phrase with "breasts" attached to the end. Things like "inside edition reporter - breasts," "world poverty - breasts." Other phrases included "drunk texting" (stop binge-drinking!) "prostitution," a number of sexual acts including the word "breasts," and even people typing about penises. The more innocent phrases were in the minority and included the bizzare "bugs," "boy catching bugs" and "big flying bug!" Obviously someone with a bug fixation.

We learn a few things from this:
1) my readership aren't as innocent as I once thought (go to your rooms!)
2) my blog is the sauciest blog out there. For all your sexual needs, from prostitution to bugs, my blog is the place to go. 

Anyway, let's move on.

Today I woke up, rolled out of bed and went to university, remembering to change into clothes between those incidents. After lecture, I was on my way to the university library talking to a friend. The conversation went something like this:

Friend: Wot you doing?
Me: Dunno. Library. You?
(we are incapable of full sentences before 12:00pm)
Friend: Going home. To bed. Maybe do some work.
Me: Where's your dorms?
Friend: Near Tate Modern.
Me: Let's go there!
Friend: Ok!

And it really was that simple.
Of course the Tate, belonging to the people, is free; a concept Americans may have trouble understanding (calm yourselves! I know, it's revolutionary, but this is Europe). How cultured are us young Brits? We voluntarily go to a museum in our spare time! 

We didn't actually go for the art (not so cultured afterall). I kept well away from it. It's rubbish.
What I went for were the slides! Let's face it, the slides are the main attraction, the art is just some sort of bizzare decor you're vaguely aware of on your way down the slides. The actual building of the Tate Modern (TM) is in an old power station and it looks like it too. So modern, it sports poured concrete floors, visible, black in-your-face steel girders, the place looks massive and power-planty. As for the outside, I believe my observation was "they should knock it down and start again."

If you're thinking of going to the Tate Modern, the slides are the only things you should be going for. The rest is rubbish!